Letting Go: When Stepping Back Helps Everyone Grow (Without Ignoring the Hard Stuff)
We all want to help, especially when we see someone struggling. Our instinct is often to jump in, offer solutions, and fix the problem. But what if stepping back—releasing control—can be the most positive thing we do, not just for them, but for ourselves?
This doesn’t mean pretending challenges don’t exist. It’s not about ignoring the hard stuff. It’s about recognizing that real growth happens when we face challenges head-on and trust that we (and those we care about) can handle them.
This has been a huge lesson for me in my parenting journey with Harlow. In the past, I would feel that rush of worry and immediately jump into action. But over time, I’ve learned that being positive doesn’t mean I have to shield her from every tough situation. I can stay hopeful and excited about her journey, even when I know it will include struggles.
This year, Harlow started middle school. She’s navigating a brand-new building with a new team of people, and I’m realistic—there will be challenges, and not everyone will be kind. But here’s where the shift happens: I don’t pretend it will all be easy, and I don’t ignore the potential difficulties. Instead, I focus on how incredible this experience will be for her growth, how she’ll rise to each occasion in her own way, and how those watching her (including me) will grow from it, too.
Why Stepping Back Works:
It’s honest positivity.
Acknowledging the hard moments while still holding space for hope is where real positivity lies. It’s about trusting that struggles are part of the process, not pretending they don’t exist.It builds confidence.
When you let someone work through a challenge, you give them the opportunity to believe in themselves. That "holy shit, I can do this" moment is empowering and leaves a lasting impact.It leads to unexpected results.
When we release control, we open the door to creativity and growth. The solutions that emerge might surprise us and often turn out better than we expected.
How You Can Step Back with Intention:
Acknowledge the challenge
Don’t ignore or dismiss it. Recognize that it’s there but know that it doesn’t need to be fixed immediately or by you.Trust in their process
Offering support without taking over allows others to discover their own strength. Your belief in them might be just what they need 🤘Embrace the unexpected
Letting go doesn’t mean giving up. It means allowing for outcomes you didn’t anticipate, which might just exceed your expectations.
Whether it’s navigating the challenges of parenting, relationships, or your personal growth, coaching helps you step back with intention. It’s about finding that balance between acknowledging life’s difficulties and trusting in the process. I’ve seen firsthand how powerful this can be in my own life and with the women I coach.
Letting go of control isn’t about faking positivity or ignoring the struggles. It’s about facing challenges while trusting the process—whether it’s your own or someone else’s. Watching Harlow tackle middle school has reminded me that it’s not just about hoping everything goes smoothly but about being open to the journey as it unfolds, challenges and all.
The next time you feel the need to step in, remember: facing the hard stuff with intention and trust is the truest form of positivity—and coaching can be the tool to help you get there.
